


the thrill of first love

by ofcoffeeanddonuts



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Oral Sex, Smut, blowjob, handjob, wesper
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-05-14 16:41:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19277296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ofcoffeeanddonuts/pseuds/ofcoffeeanddonuts
Summary: Wylan and Jesper feel the feels and talk about their relationship, and Wylan gets a blowjob.





	the thrill of first love

**Author's Note:**

> This is really just shameless fluff and smut. It mostly happened because I was thinking about the difference regarding Wylan and Jesper’s experience with relationships and the insecurities that could cause both of them to feel. (And also because you should write the smut you want to see in the world, and this is the smut that I wanted for these two.) I started writing this last year, forgot about it, and then rediscovered it while going through my old drafts and decided to finish it up. I struggled with the beginning and ending of the fic, but I think it works well enough for me to be satisfied with it. So here it is!

“Ever had your cock sucked?” Jesper asks wickedly.

“Jes - _Jesper_!” Wylan hisses, blushing pink already as he grabs his arm and glances furtively around them to see if they’ve been overheard.

Jesper is laughing as Wylan drags him along, his brilliant grin flashing. “What, merchling? I’m sure you’ve heard and seen worse in the Barrel.”

“I - yes, but - I…” Wylan sputters. The words aren’t coming to him and his tongue feels leaden in his mouth. He doesn’t want to let on how Jesper’s lewd comments affect him, and yet he can’t stop picturing the lanky Zemeni on his knees on front of him, his own white hands tangled in Jesper’s hair as he… _Better stop there or you’ll have a problem to deal with_. Wylan swallows, but his chest feels tight and he still has nothing to say. “Just… why do you say these things to me?”

Jesper goes uncharacteristically quiet, and when he speaks again his words are mumbled. “I’ll stop if you want me to.”

“No,” Wylan impulsively blurts out, face heating up when Jesper’s smile reappears. “That is, I… I like some of the things you say. But some of them are…”

Jesper ducks his head almost bashfully, looking down at him from underneath long lashes. “I know. I wish I had all the pretty words to say to you, like in those songs that you like. But I’m not very good with those words.”

Wylan feels touched, a small smile making its way onto his face. “I don’t need the pretty words. I like you the way that you are.”

Wylan could swear that a blush of Jesper’s own ruddies his brown cheeks. “Back at you, merchling.”

They walk in comfortable silence for a moment down the streets, their hands brushing every few steps, and Wylan could swear he feels sparks at each moment of contact. He’s almost giddy with their closeness, with Jesper’s continued presence in his life after the heists, with the sheer _contentedness_ he feels right now. He’s not looking over his shoulder for trouble to find them, he’s not lying about who he is, he doesn’t feel like a burden to everyone in his life. He’s _happy_. It’s almost baffling to think about.

“You never answered my question, though,” Jesper says nonchalantly as they stroll on their way back to the Van Eck residence.

Wylan coughs, feeling like the air’s been punched out of him once more. “I, um… no. I haven’t.” He feels embarrassed, less experienced than Jesper in such matters, and he refuses to look at him as he admits it. He knows Jesper has been… _around_ , has done things that he hasn’t. It makes him feel… well, it makes him feel like he’s not enough for Jesper. Like he’ll disappoint him. He’s been a disappointment his whole life, and he can’t bear for Jesper to be yet another person who sees him that way. He starts walking a little faster, putting some distance between them, but Jesper quickly catches up, his long legs making broad strides quickly, and grabs Wylan’s arm, forcing him to stop.

“What, Jesper?” Wylan huffs, still avoiding looking at him.

“Hey, Wy, look at me.” Jesper’s voice is soft, and Wylan reluctantly turns to meet his gaze. To his surprise, Jesper’s expression isn’t amused or mocking ( _or disappointed_ , he silently thinks to himself). Instead, he looks bashful, his eyes open and unguarded. “You know that doesn’t matter to me, right? You’re enough for me. Just… everything about you - it’s all I’ve ever wanted.” He sounds almost ashamed to admit it and it’s too much for Wylan. His heart swells with emotion and he pulls Jesper’s face down to his own fiercely as he kisses him deeply. Jesper follows willingly, ducking his head and letting his hands fall to Wylan’s waist as Wylan cups his face and kisses him with all the emotions pent up inside him. Jesper gives as good as he gets, tongue pushing back, teeth grazing lips, his large hands pushing their way under Wylan’s shirt to explore his chest. Wylan feels like he’s on fire, and the feeling only increases after Jesper lets out a breathy exhale when he kisses his neck. He feels like he’s going to combust, and so he lets his head fall to Jesper’s warm shoulder as he breathes heavily. He doesn’t want to become one of _those_ sights on the streets of Ketterdam. _Best to stop before things get out of hand._

Jesper pulls him closer, drawing him against his hard chest, and begins playing with Wylan’s curls. Wylan is gratified to feel Jesper’s heart pounding as fast as his own and his breath as ragged as his. “What was that about?” Jesper asks, sounding almost in awe.

Wylan feels his cheeks heat up, though they must already be so flushed he doubts it makes a difference. “Just… no one’s ever told me that before.”

Jesper brings his hand up to Wylan’s face, his thumb grazing his chin, and Wylan shivers in response but keeps his eyes focused on Jesper’s. Jesper looks angry on Wylan’s behalf, and it makes his heart flutter. “I can’t believe no one’s ever noticed how fucking brilliant you are. You’re the best damn person I’ve ever met, and screw everyone who didn’t see that.”

Wylan swallows. It’s still strange to be appreciated by somebody; it’s a little overwhelming when the praise comes from _Jesper_. “You hear me?” Jesper’s hand rubbing soft circles onto Wylan’s cheek is distracting to say the least, but his eyes are dark and determined for Wylan to hear what he’s saying.

“Yeah,” Wylan exhales, smiling up at this boy who jumbles all of his thoughts and feelings and turns him into a mess. This boy who somehow _sees_ him and _likes_ him and _believes_ in him. It’s a novel sensation, and he doesn’t know if he’ll ever get used to it.

“Good,” Jesper says quietly but firmly. “And look, you have nothing to be ashamed about, okay? It doesn’t matter to me what you have or haven’t done with people, and I hope it doesn’t matter to you what I’ve done, either.” And now it’s Jesper who won’t meet Wylan’s gaze, and it suddenly occurs to Wylan that maybe Jesper is just as worried as Wylan is about what he’ll think of his experience (or lack of), and he wants to laugh in relief.

“Jesper,” Wylan says. “It doesn’t matter to me, but… I thought it might matter to you.”

“What?” Jesper’s eyes widen for a second in disbelief before he lowers them sheepishly. “Oh. Hey, I know I make jokes about it and tease you, but it’s just - you’re so reactive, and I love to make you blush, okay? I’m sorry if it bothers you.”

“No, I just thought - well, it makes me think sometimes that I won’t be enough for you. I’ve never really done much beyond kissing, and it’s not like I’ve ever even done much of that. I spent most of my life alone in my house until my father sent me away, so I didn’t really have… opportunities.” Here Wylan blushes again. “So I’m probably not any good at any of that stuff, and I… I just don’t want to mess up with you.”

“Wylan,” Jesper says his name so affectionately and yet a bit exasperatedly. “Anything we do together is already better than anything I’ve done with anyone else because it’s with _you_ , okay? Just being with you is enough. I don’t need anything except you. Of course, I _want_ to do stuff _to_ you and _with_ you — ” and here Jesper pauses to flash him a wicked grin, “But only if you want that, too.”

“I do want that too,” Wylan mumbles as he flushes scarlet.

“You do?” Jesper grins in delight, and it’s contagious. Wylan finds himself smiling from ear to ear, and then Jesper’s lifting him up and whirling him around.

“Jesper!” Wylan laughs in protest, lightly hitting his shoulder. “Put me down!”

Jesper shakes his head vigorously. “No, you’re mine, merchling. All mine,” he growls into the curve of his neck, and Wylan stops fighting and relaxes into him as Jesper continues to mouth at his neck, hot and wet. He lets out an embarrassing mewl when Jesper hits a particularly sensitive spot, and Jesper pulls away, Wylan fears to laugh at him, but instead looks at him with impossibly dark eyes, his pupils dilated, and kisses him aggressively. Wylan’s hands instinctually go to Jesper’s hair, tugging and tangling it, and Jesper lets out a groan as he stumbles them over to the wall, propping Wylan up against it. His thigh slides between Wylan’s legs, and Wylan makes another embarrassing noise at the contact. Jesper lets out a guttural noise and exhales heavily. “You’re killing me.”

His voice is thick, and it makes Wylan squirm to know that _he_ did that. He’s the one who’s gotten Jesper Fahey all hot and bothered in the middle of the city in broad daylight. “I think you’ve gotten it mixed up there,” Wylan gasps, lightheaded as Jesper presses closer to him. Their hips and thighs brush against each other and Wylan thinks he could die. Jesper pushes forward with more pressure, and Wylan’s hips buck when their pelvises meet. “Oh, Ghezen,” he moans.

“Gods, Wylan, do you know how good you sound? How good you look? Do you know what you do to me?” Jesper’s voice is ragged and wrecked, and unmistakeable proof of what Wylan’s doing to him presses against his upper thigh. “Do you know all the things I want to do to you? Saints, you’re so pretty, Wylan.” He lapses into some broken Zemeni, and Wylan can’t make out much of what he’s saying, but he thinks he hears the words for _love_ and _beautiful_ and it makes him tingle all over and feel that much more desperate for Jesper’s touch. His hands, his mouth, his tongue, every inch of his beautiful body against his.

“I would let you do anything to me,” Wylan finds himself sighing, the words slipping out a little too sincerely. Jesper freezes, and he’s afraid he said the wrong thing, but then Jesper’s nuzzling his neck and kissing all over it more tenderly than before but with just as much passion. “I would let you ruin me,” he says, a little more boldly. He feels Jesper swallow, feels the bob of his neck, the stutter of his breathing. It gives him confidence, and he continues. “Ghezen, Jesper, I want… I _want_ you.” He fumbles over the words.

“Saints, Wylan,” Jesper groans as he continues kissing down his neck and slipping his slender brown hands up Wylan’s shirt. His calluses are rough, his hands are warm and large, and it makes Wylan shiver all over. He wants to feel those hands everywhere. “You have me. However you want me, you have me. I don’t think you’ll ever know how much I want you, too.”

“Then show me,” Wylan challenges quietly, meeting Jesper’s dark eyes.

“Yes, _yes_ , anything you want, merchling.” Jesper’s words come quick and mumbled as he frantically presses forward, his mouth attacking Wylan’s while he uses those gifted hands of his to stealthily slide his shirt off. Wylan doesn’t even notice the sudden breeze on his chest when he’s so preoccupied with Jesper, Jesper, _Jesper_ , his hands keeping him warm everywhere. “I’ll worship you. Let me take care of you.”

Wylan swallows a moan. Jesper is kissing him as if his life depends on it, and his hands are caressing him maddeningly. There’s no space in between them, no empty spot left unfilled by their bodies, and yet he still tries to move closer. It’s just heat and warmth and lean muscle and the guttural thrill of arousal, and Wylan can barely breathe, let alone think, as Jesper’s hand moves teasingly down the planes of his chest. “Is this what you want?” Jesper’s voice is low and husky.

“I… yes,” he breathes out, before wrinkling his forehead and adding, “It’s not fair though. You still have your shirt on.”

Jesper flashes a dazzling grin before swiftly removing his own shirt. “You know if you ever want me to remove my clothes, you only have to ask.” Wylan barely has time to appreciate the sight of shirtless Jesper in all his glory before he’s pressed right up against him again, and the feel of their skin flush against each other makes Wylan writhe a little in place. _Not to mention other parts of themselves flush against each other_. His cheeks pink at the thought, but luckily Jesper seems just as affected, closing his eyes and leaning his head back for a moment as Wylan adjusts to be more comfortable, caught between Jesper and the brick wall. He’s grateful for the wall holding him up; his legs feel like jelly and he’s not convinced they’d support him if he tried to walk right now. But he doesn’t have to worry about that, not when he’s got Jesper with his strong arms to keep him upright.

“Wy,” Jesper mutters, interrupting him from his thoughts.

“Hm?” he hums.

“Stop wiggling,” Jesper groans. “It’s unfair.”

It’s only then that Wylan realizes his adjusting against the wall has meant that he’s been slightly… well, grinding against Jesper, for lack of a better word. He wants to die a little, but can’t bring himself to feel truly embarrassed, not when he feels so good and Jesper is looking at him like _that_. “Sorry.” (He might be smiling as he apologizes, though.)

“Don’t be sorry, it’s just that if you keep moving like _that_ , this might be over sooner than I’d like,” Jesper huffs. Wylan laughs, and Jesper glares for a second until his expression melts into a goofy smile. “I wish I could stay mad at you, Van Sunshine,” he says haughtily, but his grin is betraying him. Wylan can’t stop smiling as he presses his face into the warmth of Jesper’s chest. He starts kissing at the brown skin softly, scraping his teeth and lips and tongue over every inch exposed to him, exploring the topography of Jesper’s chest and shoulders. He can taste the sweat from today’s hot sun, salty and uniquely _Jesper_. He wouldn’t mind staying like this for the rest of his life, he thinks absently.

Jesper has his hands in Wylan’s hair, playing with his red-gold curls, watching the colors the sun brings out in it. The movements are fond and endearing, and it sends another rush of warmth through Wylan for this boy he loves so much. He redoubles his efforts to kiss him senseless.

Jesper seizes that moment to tease him back, agonizingly slowly thrusting his hips against his own. The friction and heat feels overwhelmingly good, and Wylan wants nothing more than to give into the sensations. So he does, meeting Jesper’s thrusts by bucking his own hips back. Jesper groans, low in his throat, at the contact but doesn’t break stride. They fall into a rhythm, their erections brushing against each other through their pants as they rut like animals in heat. Like the horny teenagers they are, caught up in each other and unaware of the world around them.

“I’m…” Wylan gasps, lightheaded. He doesn’t even know what he was going to say, but Jesper is suddenly kneeling in front of him, lanky legs folded over. Wylan’s eyes widen as Jesper reaches up to stroke him through his pants deftly before sliding them down just enough to release his cock, hard and standing at attention. He closes his eyes, overwhelmed by the sight of Jesper on his knees before him looking at his cock like it’s the most delicious thing he’s ever seen.

“Hey,” Jesper kisses near his hipbone, waiting for Wylan to look at him again. “Do you want me to?” He sounds shyer than Wylan is used to hearing him.

“I… only if you want to,” he manages to get out.

Jesper looks at him incredulously. “Oh, I want to. Trust me, I _really_ want to.” He grins deviously, and then he’s lowering his mouth to the head of his cock, hovering for a moment, his breath hot against him.

Wylan thinks this is the best torture he’s ever experienced. “Jes, _please_ ,” he begs.

Jesper takes his cock into his mouth without further delay. It’s warm and wet and Jesper’s tongue is so, so talented, running along the length of him as he brings his hands up to assist in his efforts, tugging and stroking at him. And the _noises_ Jesper’s making… Ghezen. It’s all so obscene, and it makes his breath quicken and stutter. Wylan would never have thought a blowjob could be such an enjoyable thing to give, and yet Jesper looks blissfully happy kneeling before him.

Wylan’s hands scrabble at the brickwork before tentatively finding their way to entwine in Jesper’s hair. Jesper makes a happy noise in reply, so he lets himself take a firmer grasp. And _Saints_ , this picture is even better than the one he saw in his head when their conversation began because it’s so _real_ : Jesper’s head bobbing up and down between his legs, Wylan’s hands tugging him ever closer. It’s warm and wet and messy and perfect, and Jesper seems to think so as well, judging by his enthusiastic participation and the tent in his pants that Wylan physically aches to get his hands on. But he’s been beaten to the task; Jesper already has one hand on his cock, drawing it out of his pants as he rubs at it. And okay, maybe now Wylan can understand how someone can enjoy giving a blowjob because he’s pretty sure his mouth waters at the sight of Jesper’s cock, sticking long and dusky brown and beautiful out of his pants, a light dusting of dark coarse hair leading towards it. Yeah, he understands now.

And then Jesper starts working himself faster, and Wylan moans involuntarily at the sight, and then Jesper’s mouth tightens around him, and Wylan can’t be held responsible for any noises he makes while in this situation, really. The sensations are all so overwhelming. He’s never felt anything nearly like this before, never imagined just how good it could feel, even in his private moments. Even when his fantasies began to involve a certain Zemeni, even once he knew Jesper felt the same way about him — never did he know it could feel like this. They’d never gotten much further beyond lengthy, heated makeout sessions and some over the pants action before, and at the time, Wylan had thought that alone might kill him. But now that he knows what Jesper’s mouth feels like on him and knows what his cock looks like... well. He can only imagine what new sensations there are to experience.

Jesper’s mouth is becoming more insistent around his cock, sucking it deeper and deeper until Wylan fears he won’t be able to breathe. But then Jesper _smirks_ up at him, and Wylan thrusts unintentionally in response because the way Jesper is looking at him really does things to his heart and his mind and his body. It’s the hottest thing Wylan’s ever seen, Jesper sucking him while he jerks himself off. Wylan squirms, the pressure low in his gut building up and nearing its breaking point. “Jes... _Jesper_ ,” he whines.

Jesper only grows more determined in his efforts, and it’s killing Wylan to see Jesper stroking his cock so fiercely. He thinks he could get off just watching Jesper masturbate. “ _Ghezen_ , Jes, you look so good, feel so good,” he babbles. “I’m so close, you’re so good, so good to me.”

Jesper _moans_ at that, and the vibrations it sends around his cock have Wylan seeing stars. “Jes, I’m gonna...” Wylan is cut off by the spasms of his orgasm distracting him, embarrassing noises involuntarily leaving his mouth as he comes. He expects Jesper to take his mouth off his cock now, but he keeps sucking and swallowing instead, meeting Wylan’s eyes as if it’s a challenge. Wylan moans once more, feeling unbearably turned on as Jesper swallows everything he has to offer. Only once Jesper is convinced he’s swallowed everything does he remove his mouth from Wylan’s cock. His lips are red and swollen, his dark skin flushed, and his eyes are so dark that they make Wylan feel like he could fall into them and never emerge.

“Merchling,” Jesper’s voice is gravelly, and Wylan flushes all over to know _he did_   _that to him_ , “you taste so good.”

Wylan swallows, hard, the words leaving him breathless and feeling needy all over again. His eyes fall to Jesper’s cock, which Jesper still has grasped, hard and leaking, in his hand, and now it’s Wylan’s turn to drop to his knees. “I want... I want to touch you,” Wylan breathes out.

Jesper shudders at that, his hand clenching tighter around his cock. “ _Gods_ , Wylan,” he moans, almost incomprehensibly. Feeling emboldened, Wylan trails a hand down Jesper’s bare chest, fascinated by the way his skin puckers in response. He reaches the trail of dark hair leading to Jesper’s cock and pauses. Jesper’s body is a work of art, and he wants to take it all in. It’s Jesper’s turn to squirm as Wylan takes his time to reach Jesper’s cock, finally brushing it with the tips of his fingers. Jesper groans at the contact, and it sends shivers down Wylan’s spine to know that he has this kind of effect on the boy he loves. It emboldens him, and he wraps his hand around Jesper’s on his cock.

Slowly, he slides their hands along Jesper’s cock together, up and down, and Jesper shudders. Wylan looks at him to see his gaze fixated on their hands clutching his cock together and smiles. He leans towards Jesper, mouth nearly touching his ear as he breathes out, “We look good together, don’t we?”

Jesper swallows, hard, biting back a moan as his cock pulses at the words. He can’t stop looking at Wylan’s fair smooth hand on his own dark rough one. It’s a compelling contrast, made all the more compelling by being wrapped around his cock, and Jesper feels a fresh surge of _want_. “Wylan, please,” his voice rasps out.

Wylan lets out a shiver of his own. He doesn’t know if Jesper’s voice sounding like _that_ will ever cease to affect him, and Jesper’s cock, hard and wanting in his hand, is certainly affecting him too. He wants so badly to see him come apart. He gently removes Jesper’s hand from his cock before he wraps his hand around it once again. He wants to do this himself.

Jesper lets out another strangled noise at the sight of Wylan’s elegant hand wrapped around him, deliberately stroking as his wrist twists in ways that have Jesper feeling on the verge of some great precipice. Wylan is so _soft_ , so _smooth_ , even as he jerks him off so obscenely on the streets of Ketterdam. “Wy, you... you...” Jesper struggles to put into words what he’s thinking and feeling in this moment. All he knows is that he could die a happy man.

With a particularly wicked flick of the wrist and firm stroke down his cock, Wylan leans in to whisper to him, “This is how I touch myself when I think of you.”

And that’s all it takes for Jesper to fall apart, to come in Wylan’s hand with the image of the merchling touching himself while thinking of _him_ , while imagining scenarios just like this one happening now, because Jesper’s spent many a night taking himself in hand while imagining Wylan, too, and it’s almost unbearable how good the reality feels.

He spends a moment breathing hard, feeling totally blissed out, before looking at Wylan once again. Part of him was afraid Wylan would regret getting physical, but his eyes are warm and open and adoring, a sweet contrast to the sinful mess Jesper made of his curls and mouth. Jesper can’t imagine he looks much different - his jaw is aching from how deeply he took Wylan in, and he knows his lips must be a sight, but he doesn’t care at all. In fact, given another few minutes, he would be ready to wreck himself and Wylan all over again.

“Hi,” Jesper grins up at the boy he feels such immense things for. The boy who fills him with warmth and happiness and belief in goodness. The boy who’s made him realize what love can be, what his life can be.

“Hi,” Wylan smiles back brightly. 

“So, you’ve had your cock sucked now,” Jesper laughs breathlessly. “How was it?”

Wylan goes red.

**Author's Note:**

> WOW I love Six of Crows and I love all the relationships in it and I love these two for sparking my creative muse. ANYWAYS, Wylan and Jesper are HAPPY and IN LOVE and LIVING THEIR BEST LIVES and that’s canon! 
> 
> bonus shoutout to anyone who recognizes what the title is from


End file.
